Tuesday, March 4, 2008

The "titles" just don't matter...


I grew up in a really "traditional" household - mom, dad, and sister. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins were also pretty straightforward. It wasn't until Dan and I got married that I learned about the world of step-parents and such. I gained a mother-in-law, a stepfather-in-law, a father-in-law, and a stepfather-in-law, and as an adult had to figure out how all that worked. Fortunately, in Dan's family it works rather well. And while it may seem like it got even more complicated this year when my father-in-law and stepmother-in-law divorced, for us, nothing changed.

Here's what I've learned - the titles just don't matter. Even though Robert and Mary aren't together any more, we all still love Mary and want her in our lives. We still consider her family, and Max calls her Grandma Mary.

This last weekend, Mary, Carrie (my sister-in-law), and Garth (her boyfriend) came to visit. It was the first time Mary was able to meet both Garth and Luke (Luke and Garth met the day Luke was born, but that's another story). Within minutes, things felt easy and natural - lots of updating on family, laughing at Max, and cooing over Luke. And when Marian and Tom (Dan's mom and stepdad) came for dinner the "mixed" families didn't seem at all strange. It's wonderful when fantastic adults can get along together because they are great people, and not get caught up in how akward things are supposed to be.

Max was in heaven - surrounded by people he loves and who all love him. Luke was a pretty happy camper, too (but isn't he always?). And the rest of us just enjoyed good conversation and spending time loving each other. Because while the "titles" haven't been hard to overcome, distance is a much bigger annoyance.

But that's what airplanes are for, right?

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