Slow down!!!!

I'm sure I've said it here before, but time is just simply going too fast.

This last weekend, time came to change out all of Luke's 3-6 month clothing for the 6-12 month clothing. Each time I do this, it gets harder. After all, Luke is probably our last baby. I won't ever have a little teeny tiny one again, and that just breaks my heart. I am one of those people
who have always dreamed of being a mama - and in my head, that picture includes babies. Before I know it, we'll be out of the baby stage.

It doesn't help that my babies are giants. At Luke's 4 month appointment last week, he was 16 lbs, 6 oz, and 26.75 inches long (90th and 95th percentiles). He is cruising through the clothing sizes, and quickly getting too big for the bouncy chair and swing.

It's to the point that I felt depressed when I woke up this morning and realized that Luke slept through the night. What kind of sick mom am I? But all I could think was how I'm not ready for him to move out of our bed just yet. As I've written about before, sleeping curled up with your slumbering infant feels better than eating chocolate chip cookies in a hot tub while getting a massage. But if he's sleeping through the night, then there's no good excuse to have him with us.

I know that it doesn't do any good to be sad about all this - it's inevitable. And truthfully, I look forward to the things that are ahead of us when the boys are older. But it still makes me a little sad. Unfortunately for you, this is where I come these days to vent about all these extra emotions that motherhood has brought into my life.

So that's that.

So great....

Weekends, by definition, are good. This one was great. One of those rare combinations of relaxing and getting all the things done that you wanted to - and with great weather to boot!

The weather offered Dan some great time to do some much needed motorcycle riding - I am so happy that he has this passion that offers him such release. The boys and I did the grocery shopping (not usually my favorite thing), and found some great strawberries, which makes everything wonderful. We played outside all afternoon yesterday, planted some lettuce, cilantro, baby bok choy, and summer bulbs, and made chocolate chip cookies after dinner.

Today my parents returned from Canada and the birth of my beautiful niece. They hung out and played with the boys for a while, and as typical when my dad comes to visit, helped us get some long-overdue chores done. Dan and my dad put together a bookshelf that I bought from IKEA ages ago to be used as a toy shelf in the living room. And this afternoon I got the chance to do some sewing (a couple of pouch slings for my cousin who is due with twins very soon).

Just a couple things:

- I want to totally recommend this book. I've only done the master recipe, but it's been great to have fresh homemade bread so easily! It's also been a big hit amongst my NCB group.

- Work has been going well - in fact, it's Sunday evening, and I'm not even crying!

- I'm looking to learn to knit. If anyone has great recommendations for classes/books, please leave me a comment with that info! Or, if you think I am nuts to try and tackle one more hobby that I don't currently have time for, let me know that, too!

Hope that you all had a great weekend, and that the change in weather tomorrow doesn't stick around too long! After all, I want to go to the Tulip Festival next weekend...

It happened....

Today was the day. As a working-outside-the-home mom, you know it's inevitable. You are going to miss things - and sometimes you may miss the big things.

Luke rolled over for the first time today. At daycare.

Yup. I'm bummed. But you know what? It's ok. With Max, I would have cried, and probably not just a little. But this time around, I am trying to take it all as it comes. Just because I wasn't there the very first time he rolled over, I will get to watch him roll over a million times to come. I am the one that gets to hold him in the night, nurse him, cuddle him, and love him more than anyone else can. And that is pretty great. I have to let it outweigh the other - or I'll go crazy.

And right now, he's laying here with me, babbling away. And rolling over.

So, Luke, buddy, promise me I won't miss everything...

She's here!!!!!

In the wee hours of Monday morning, my beautiful niece Savannah Jane entered the world. She and her mama and daddy are all doing well, and all is right in the world. I am just so happy for them - there's nothing like that time when you change from being a couple to a family.

Now if only I didn't have to wait until June to meet her!

Anticipation...

A few hours ago, we received the call we've been waiting for - my little sister is headed to the hospital to have her baby. Apparently her water broke while she was out grocery shopping with my mom. I can't wait to hear the whole story. But in any case, my fantastic brother-in-law called, and they were getting ready to start pitocin to help her begin active labor. Within 24 hours, my niece will be here!

I can't even begin to express how excited I am! While things between my sister and I weren't very smooth growing up, as an adult, she is probably my best friend (apart from Dan, of course). She is the person I feel safest being completely truthful with, and I know that she will love me no matter what snide comment I make, or petty complaint I have. She is making me an aunt for the first time - something I have always wanted to be. And this baby is a girl - a break from the snips and snails and puppy dog tails around this place. Wow - it's all just so cool!

It's going to sound silly, but since she won't read this until after the whole thing is over, I am going to go ahead and put it out there. I am just so proud of her. She is a wonderful human being who is going to become only more selfless and giving by becoming a mom. The challenges she faces as a mom are only going to give her more strength, more patience, and greater faith in herself. And as much as I hate being so far away, I am glad that she will get to experience it all without her big sister "helping" a.k.a. telling her the "right" way. I can't wait to see her find her own way around this whole adventure, and have no doubt she will do it with grace.

So, kiddo, fingers are crossed, prayers are being said, and we're waiting. We love you!

Saturday bliss...

You know, it's not so bad. We're a week in, and things have gone just fine.

I really appreciate all of the support that you have all given me this week. My amazing sister and brother-in-law sent me flowers on my first day back, and my parents sent some once I'd made it halfway through the week. The emails checking in on us have been great, too.

The boys seem to be adjusting. For Luke, it's easy. Max appears on the surface to be doing great, but some ornery behavior tells the truth - that this is an adjustment for him, too. We'll see how things go this next week, and if the newness of his new daycare wears off.

One thing that has happened is a renewed appreciation of the weekend. We hardly left the house today, and just laid around - but it felt heavenly. There's not a whole lot better than a mid-afternoon nap with a beautiful baby. And tonight we're watching a movie (No Country for Old Men - really cheerful, right?). Tomorrow will be the cleaning/getting life reorganized day.

So, once again, thanks for just thinking of us this last week. I feel so fortunate to have people that care about these changes in our lives. It means more than you know....

So far, so good.....

Two days in, and I'm still alive.

First of all, my students have been so wonderfully welcoming. It makes it so much easier to have these wonderful young people that I adore (many whom I've had the good fortune of teaching for a couple of years now) greeting me every morning. They've made me feel so appreciated, and it's been a great reminder that I do love my job.

Secondly, Max has woken up the last two mornings excited to go to his new daycare. He seems to have a great time there, and when I picked him up this afternoon he barely noticed I'd arrived. Luke is eating just fine, and seems to be doing well. Both boys are getting positive reports, and I'm still feeling comfortable with them there.

So far, we are doing well. The mornings haven't killed me yet, and I am surviving the pumping sessions that take up both my lunch and planning time. Dan's been a great help, and my students have been fun. You know, I'm not even faking that things are ok!